The ColoRed Chuck
by acosta perez jose ramiro
Summary: A parody and a tribute to a funny Mexican superhero. Played by Chuckie. Rated for some violence on later chapters.
1. Heroic introduction

SUMMARY: A parody and a tribute to a funny Mexican superhero. Played by Chuckie. Rated for some violent scenes in later chapters.

Hello, everyone! (Good thing you guys are here. I was getting bored with just this guy for company) Yes, I like you too, Angie.

This time I decided to do something special. Yours truly is Mexican... (And where's your "sombrero"?) Ehem! As I was saying, I'm Mexican, and I decided to write this fic based on a Mexican superhero, "El Chapulín Colorado". (Can you translate, please?) Well, it means something like "The Red Colored Grasshopper", Angie. (A superhero named after a bug? That's pathetic!) Just 2 words, Angelica... Peter Parker. (Good point.) Anyway, he is a comedic hero, and, in many ways, acts a lot like Chuckie, so I decided to give him this role. But first, Angelica...

(I'm on it. DISCLAIMER. Ramiro doesn't own the Rugrats/AGU characters, who are property of ClaskyKsupo and Nickelodeon. El Chapulín Colorado... I think I spelled it right... is property of Televisa, and his creator, comedy writer and actor Roberto Gómez Bolaños, aka "Chespirito"... for the record, his nickname stands for "Little Shakespeare", since he is one of the most prolific comedy writers ever.)

Now, one last author's note. Chespirito created some words and phrases for his characters that had become common use or knowledge among Mexicans. One of them, that I will use a few times in the story, is "Chanfle"; depending on the sentence is used, it can mean "Oh, my God!", "Cool!", or a substitute for a bad word. Also, all the characters will be around their twenties in this story.

(Enough of that... On with the show!)

THE COLORED CHUCK.

A fic by Acosta Pérez José Ramiro.

HEROIC INTRODUCTION.

In a dark stage, a heroic music, mixture of trumpets and fiddles, precedes a single light that illuminates a little turtle in one corner of the stage... While Tommy's voice is heard, making a presentation.

"Faster than a speeding tortoise!"

The music gets a little faster. Another light appears, showing a mouse in the opposite side of the stage.

"Stronger than a mouse!"

The music is now more rythmic. A third light shows a lettuce's head on the center.

"More noble than a lettuce!"

A human figure appears behind the lettuce. A light appears illuminating his chest, showing a big yellow heart with red "CH" letters in the middle.

"His shield is a heart!"

The center light bright the most, showing Chuckie in a heroic posture, with the fists on his hips, and dressed in red tights, wearing a hood with antennae; his sneakers are red and yellow, and has yellow short pants over the legs' tights. His face is clearly seen, including his glasses, and the back part of the outfit has a tail similar to a tuxedo's. The music is on crescendo now.

"He is... The ColoRed Chuck!"

Chuckie takes a step ahead... and trips with the lettuce, falling from the stage.

The mouse and the turtle look at him with a quizzical expression.

"I did it on purpose to finish the presentation... Let's start the story, okay?" Chuckie's pained voice is heard.

DAMSEL (?) IN DISTRESS.

The stage is a dark room, illuminated only by a single light bulb; the place seems to be some kind of storage room, since there are many cardboard boxes and a barrel in there. Angelica is wearing a black top and a blue mini-skirt, and her hair is on a bun. She walks all over the place, and tries to open the door in frustration. Is locked, so there's no way out. She sighs and sits on a little chair placed near the barrel. A moment later, the door opens, and she stands up, crossing her arms and trying to keep an angry expression.

Timothy McNulty opens the door, and gets into the room. He is wearing the classical gangster's outfit (hat, shirt, tie... you imagine it). He gives Angelica a wicked smile, and tries to touch her, but she steps back.

"What's the matter, Angie?", he directs to her in a mocking tone. "A few days ago you liked my touch. Aren't you happy to see me?"

"No darling. No honey. No sweetheart." She replies in a faked sweet tone, filled with sarcasm and anger. "Of course I don't like seeing you! What do you expected? I had been in this room for almost 2 days, barely slept, and the only thing you feed me is what you get out of the nearest vending machine... and you just gave me a chocolate with coconut's filling... YUK!", she snaps, annoyed.

"Sorry about that, dear... but you forced me to do it." Timmy talks in a quiet and cool tone. "I mean, you were about to call the cops when I found you yesterday. Never thought you would be a stool pigeon."

"Well, what did you expected?" Angelica says, more calmed but still angry. "I wanted to believe all those rumors were a fake, but they were true. I can't believe I dated "Tim Thug", Public Enemy Number One! You always said you were in the pharmaceutical business!"

"I am. I place little lead's pills inside human bodies...of course, the introduction is rather painful for them." Timmy says, followed by a little sinister chuckle. He immediately turns more serious, and talks straight to Angelica. "Well, Angie, I think you know what I want. You can stay with me, and keep your mouth closed... or I can use you as a human shield in my next robbery!" He snaps at her. Angelica gulps a little, but keeps her cool.

"I... need some time to think about it. You know me; I need an hour just to choose the shoes I will wear next day." Angelica tells him, trying to get more time.

"Okay. I'll get a little walk, and I expect your answer when I finish it." Timmy says in his serious tone. He then walks a circle around Angelica, and stops in front of her. "There. What did you decided?" Angelica slaps her forehead and rolls her eyes.

"Maybe you should take a longer walk, don't you think?" She tells him, and then mumbles under her breath, "In the railroad would be nice." Timmy scratches his head, and shrugs.

"Oh, well, I guess you are right. I need to go to the bank and take some money from my account anyway. I no longer trust them to take care of it; there are many robberies this days." Timmy walks to the door, and, before leaving, gives Angelica a nasty scowl. "Remember, you can stand by me... or in front of me! Bye." He waves good-bye to her, and locks the door from the outside.

"Bye darling. Bye honey. Bye sweetheart... Chanfle, why I allowed him to convince me to talk this way?" Angelica talked to herself. She was angry, and, sadly, she had to admit she was also scared. Even if she wasn't the most honest girl around, she had never done something really illegal, and didn't wanted to start. But, if she denied to be Timmy's accomplice, she would be her next victim. Angelica sighed, and sat on the chair, with a really concerned look on her face.

"Oh!" she talked loud voiced to herself. "And now, who will protect me?"

In a perfect cue, a red hooded guy popped his head out of the barrel next to her, and a heroic music was heard on the background.

"I!" Chuckie exclaimed.

"The ColoRed Chuck!" Angelica turned to see him, with a look of surprise and a little bit of happiness.

"Didn't count with my cleverness!" Chuckie said in a proud tone. "Good guys, follow me!" He jumps out of the barrel, but trips with the edge, and falls to the floor.

Angelica returns to her concerned look.

"What I did to deserve this?"


	2. The Rescuer

THE RESCUER

Angelica looks at the "superhero", who is starting to stand up. Even if he doesn't looks like a big deal, she is concerned because of the hit he just received.

"Are you okay?", she asks. Chuckie dusts himself off, and tries to keep his cool.

"Of course I'm okay. I did that on purpose to check the floor's integrity. All my movements are coldly calculated." He tries to cover his mistake... and misses terribly. Angelica sighs, and repeats to herself that he might be the only one that can help her, but, being her, can't resist the temptation of teasing him a little.

"Anyway, good thing you appeared, ColoRed Chuck. I had heard a lot about you." She says in a happy tone. Chuckie inflates his chest a little, and gives her a nice smile.

"I know you are clumsy, a scaredy-cat, accident prone..." Angelica starts listing, while counting with her fingers. Chuckie scowls at her, but, before he can talk again, Angelica concludes "... and that you are a very brave hero; I truly believe the last part." Chuckie returns to a trusting smile.

"Because you have to be very brave to become a hero when you are clumsy, a scaredy-cat, accident prone..." Angelica continues.

"She takes advantage of my nobleness." Chuckie talks to himself, and sighs. He then directs to Angelica. "You summoned me for help, or just wanted to have a cheap laugh at my expenses?" Angelica sighs as well, and returns to her worried expression. Enough laughing for the moment.

"Do you know Timothy McNulty?" she asks him.

"The one who is nicknamed "Tim Thug"?" Chuckie asks.

"Yes." Angelica nods.

"Public Enemy Number One?" Chuckie continues.

"Yeah." Angelica says, a little more animated.

"Wanted for robbery, assault, blackmailing, not respecting the red light, counterfeiting money, and chewing gum in his forth grade classroom?" Chuckie concludes.

"Yes darling! Yes honey! Yes sweetheart!" Angelica exclaims.

"Nope, I don't know him." Chuckie shrugs. Angelica groans, but, before she can say another thing, Chuckie continues. "I mean, not personally, but I had heard about him a lot. The Union had been behind him for some time now."

"What Union?" Angelica asks.

"The Union of Heroes, Paladins, and Similar, of course. All the superheroes are members, you know. Last night I played poker with the Crimson Chin, Catman, InvisoBill, XJ-9, Monkeyman... of course, we play with bananas instead of money." Chuckie explains. Then he goes back to business. "Let me guess. He is the one that locked you in this place, right?"

"Yes. I used to date him, but just discovered he is the famous criminal everyone is trying to catch, so I decided to turn him to the authorities. Unfortunately, he caught me first, and locked me in here yesterday." Angelica explains, and lowers her head. "I didn't wanted to believe he was that villain, but he usually was very kind with me... yes, a little tough, but kind. I thought he really liked me." Chuckie places a hand on her shoulder, and tries to cheer her up.

"Well, you know the old and known proverb. Not everything that glows for its cover." He says. Angelica gives him a puzzled look, and Chuckie makes one as well, realizing what he just said. "No, wait... ah, yes. Don't judge a book is gold!" He smiles and crosses his arms. He notices Angie's look, and then he starts rubbing his chin, realizing his mistake again.

"No, wait... you can't judge a book made of gold... or read it, by the way... because you might not be able to open it... unless only the cover is made of gold... and then, you don't judge it, because is already a very expensive thing..." He thinks for a few more seconds, and then shrugs and talks to Angie. "Well, you got the idea."

"Actually, I didn't got a thing." Angelica shakes her head. "Except maybe a migraine, and the lost of a couple of neurons. Anyway, can you save me, or what?" she snaps at him. Chuckie starts looking around for a way out.

"Why don't we leave by the same way you entered, Einstein?". She tells him, matter-of-factly, but he just shakes his head.

"We can't. When someone summons my help, I get the message with my antennae, and then get transported to the place. But, from there, I must move on my own." Chuckie explains to her. Then he sees a little window on top of the room, very high to reach it even standing on each other's shoulders, but he gets an idea. "Got it. I'll place the barrel and some crates, and make a tower to climb to that window."

"That wouldn't work. The crates are empty, so they'll not be able to stand our weight." Angelica points.

"Suspected that from the beginning." Chuckie tries his expert-like tone again. He starts checking the room again, and looks at the door. "I got it! We'll pass under the door!"

"Keep giving dumb plans, and I'll make you pass!" Angelica shoves her fist in front of his face. Obviously, this so-called hero isn't as useful as she expected. He gulps, and moves his hands in front of him for defense.

"No, you don't get it. Look, we'll use one of my tricks." Chuckie then takes a little jar out from his pants. "These are Shrinktolin pills. Just swallow one, and you'll be small enough to slid down the door." Angelica gives him a "you must be crazy" scowl. Chuck notices she is not believing him, and decides to show her. He takes 2 pills out of the jar, and places it back inside his pants. He then gives one to Angelica.

"Look at this. I'll do it first to show you it's for real." Chuckie swallows his pill, and moves near the door. Then, he gets a blank look, and, 2 seconds later, shrinks in the blink of an eye! Angelica can't believe it.

"Chanfle!" she says, stunned, while leaning to look at him. Chuck is now slightly smaller than a regular mouse. "Now I had seen everything!"

"Didn't count with my cleverness, right?" he screams to be audible, while adopting an heroic pose. "Just swallow your pill, and we'll be out in a moment. The pills' effect last a few minutes... I never know exactly how many, but is always less than twelve. And don't worry, Shriktolin has no side effects, and your stuff is always shrunk with you, so you'll not be naked or something!" Angelica actually liked the explanation, but was hesitant to take the pill.

"I don't know... being so little sounds a little risky." Angelica admitted. Chuckie tries to encourage her.

"I know. I was scared too the first time, but remember the old and known proverb...Finest things come at the given horse's mouth!" Angie rolls her eyes. Chuckie realizes the mistake, and tries again.

"No, wait... Never look in small packages!" Chuckie says in his expert tone, but then realizes he just mixed the proverbs again. "No, it wasn't like that... never look in a small package, because you can find better things in a horse's mouth... of course, this only works if you are a veterinarian dentist... in that case, teeth so large are the finest things, and, if you want to keep them you use a small package... Well, you got the idea!" Chuckie exclaims, willing to kick himself.

Angelica sighs, and, deciding the pill is her best option, swallows it. A few seconds later, she is as small as Chuck. However, since this is the first time she shrinks, she gets overwhelmed by the size's change, and actually gets a little dizzy. Chuckie notices it, and grabs her hand.

"Don't worry. You'll be fine in a moment. Come on, I'll lead you out." He talks to her, and starts leading her to the door. Angelica actually feels okay while holding his hand. They finally crawl under the door, and appear in the next room. Is actually a really big one; it would take a few seconds to go through it, but, at their size, is like a stadium.

"Why don't we wait until the effect of the pill is gone, and then walk to the door?" Angelica asks, not willing to walk so much. Chuckie shakes his head.

"I don't think that's a good idea. If your ex-boyfriend appears before we're full sized, he might crush us. Plus, it would be good to reach next door while we are still this size, so we don't need to take another to get out." Chuck points to Angelica. She sighs, and they start walking.


	3. Escape from the front room

ESCAPE FROM THE FRONT ROOM.

Chuckie leads Angelica through the room. Because of previous experiences, he decides to walk next to the walls, because that way, if someone appears, they will be less noticeable than if they were at the middle of the room. Angelica is still a little nervous because of her size; she isn't used to be helpless, and being the smallest girl alive makes her feel vulnerable. Chuckie notices it, and decides to do something to calm her down a little. Out of nowhere, he takes out a red and yellow mallet, that looks a lot like a cartoon's one. Angelica wide opens her eyes, thinking about how many other surprises this guy might have.

"See this one? Is my main weapon; I call it the Skweaky Lumper, because it makes a "skweak" sound when I hit someone with it." Chuckie explains to her. "Is designed to stun or knock out an enemy without causing any major damage. If we find a spider, rat, or something, I can use it to protect ourselves." Chuckie finishes. Angelica looks a little more relieved, and gets more curious about her rescuer.

"Do you have any other weapon or trick besides that?" She asks. Chuckie shakes his head.

"Well, I don't like to use weaponry because I really hate to fight. Besides my pills, and the Skweaky Lumper, my main equipment are my antennae." Chuckie points to the funny things on his hood. "Besides telling me when someone needs my help, they also work as my friend Spidey's sixth sense, alerting me when an enemy is close, so I can prepare an ambush, or hide. They do a few other things, but I usually just limit their use to the basic functions." Angelica glances at the antennae; sure, they look funny and a little ridiculous, but obviously are useful.

"If I can ask, why did you became a hero? Obviously, you don't like to face danger, and there are many other guys that can fight crime more effectively." Angie tells him, trying to not sound insulting. Chuckie just shrugs, and explains to her while they keep walking.

"Well, it wasn't for the money, I can tell you. The Union pays for my food and gives me a room and a few other things, like my medical insurance, but I don't have a lot more than what I am using right now. But I became a hero because I like to help people. Sure, I get easily scared, but I can't stand when someone is in trouble and nobody helps him or her.

Besides, I don't just fight crime; I also help finding missing persons, solve domestic troubles, or just cheer up depressed people. I had used this shrinking trick to recover rings that had gone through the drain, and stuff like that; can you imagine the Crimson Chin doing that? He can beat up a super villain in a blink, but to do that delicate stuff, he would need to rip the sink from the wall!" Chuckie and Angelica chuckle a little. He continues his explanation, happy that he's helping her not being afraid.

"Sometimes I need to keep an image of the classic "I-can-do-and-know-everything" kind of guy so people can trust me... that's why I try the phrases and the proverbs, but, as you already noticed, I usually mix the last ones. I had tried to correct that, but this problem once helped me to make a sad kid smile, so I guess isn't that bad."

"You aren't that bad, ColoRed Chuck." Angelica says, giving him a genuine smile. She actually was starting to admire this guy. Sure, he wasn't Justice League material, but he honestly cared about her, and wanted to help even if it meant to face a risk. "Just one question. If you like to help people, why didn't you became a doctor, a social worker or something?"

"Hey, I do a lot of social working. And besides, a regular job doesn't allow you to do some really cool stuff like shrinking to the size of an action figure and having a nice walk with a pretty girl in a space smaller than a regular park." Chuckie blushes a little at the last part, and Angelica does it as well. So, this guy is a little flirty as well, Angelica thought; she didn't mattered about it. In the few minutes they had been walking, Chuckie had shared more about himself than Timmy did in their whole time together.

After a couple of minutes, they were just a few feet away from the door. Suddenly, Chuck stopped on his tracks, and a beeping sound was easily heard. Chuck immediately got into an alert position.

"Hush. Silence. My antennae are detecting an enemy's presence!" he tells to Angelica. She gulps, since that might mean Timmy is on his way back. Chuckie grabs her from the arm, and uses his left hand to lift his mallet, ready for anything; they both run behind a little box next to the door.

A few seconds later, Timothy opens the door, and closes it in a swift movement; he looks really agitated. Panting, he takes out his gun, and starts checking how many bullets he has left. Immediately takes out a little box, and starts recharging.

Meanwhile, behind the box, Angelica feels a knot in her stomach. At first, she thinks is because of fear, but it feels really weird. Chuckie takes a look at her face, and asks her how did she feels. When she explains him the sensation, Chuckie gasps.

"Chanfle!" He exclaims. "That means the pill is losing effect, and you are about to recover your regular size!" Angelica gasps as well, and, before she or him can say anything else, she is growing back. The change is as fast as the shrinking process, so she gets stunned for a few seconds.

"Well, how did you got out of the room?" McNulty asks, surprised.

Angelica gulps, and just manages to say "I passed down the door!" while keeping a sheepish smile. McNulty, of course, isn't amused by the answer.

"Funny. Well, I don't care how you did it. Actually, is a good thing, because now I will be able to use you as a shield." He smirks, and moves towards her, with his gun ready. A second before he can touch her, a high leveled voice is heard by them.

"Hey, don't dare touch her!" McNulty and Angelica look down to see Chuck in a menacing pose; of course, because of his size, it would only be menacing for an insect. McNulty does a double take, but manages to recognize the outfit.

"The ColoRed Chuck? I knew you weren't too tall, but this is ridiculous!" McNulty says, surprised. A moment later, however, he gets recovered, and smirks to the tiny hero. "And what are you going to do? Kick my toenail?". Timmy laughs, without realizing that a red and yellow blunt object is heading against him.

SKWEAK!

McNulty moves a few steps back before falling on his butt. Angelica opens her eyes in amazement. Chuck's pill lost its effect just in time, and caught Timmy by surprise, hitting him with the Lumper. However, Timmy isn't totally out of commission, and shots against them. Chuckie opens the door, and uses it to shield Angelica and himself from the bullet; Angie quickly takes the bullets' box, who Timmy dropped after receiving the attack, and then she and Chuck run away.

Timmy incorporates, and tries to chase them, but is stopped and forced to go back to the room by a shot that comes from the next building. A moment later, a female voice is easily heard.

"Okay, McNulty, we know you are in there. I'm officer DeVille, and my partner and I are giving you the chance to give up yourself! Get out with the hands up!"


	4. The DeVilles are here

THE DEVILLES ARE HERE.

On the outside, the place's location is finally revealed. Is actually a large warehouse, placed in the docks, with plenty of similar warehouses around. On the corner of the warehouse in front of Tim's hideout, officers Phil and Lil DeVille are using the building for cover, and receiving two people who just escaped from McNulty's hold.

"Chanfle!" Phil exclaims. "The ColoRed Chuck!"

"The one and only. Glad you guys appeared." Chuckie shakes both cops hands, and then points to Angelica. "She is McNulty's former girlfriend. He had her trapped in there to use as a hostage." Angelica nods, and talks to the cops.

"Angelica Pickles, glad to meet you... officers Lil and Phil, right?" Angelica quickly reads the cops' badges. "How did you guys found us?"

"We saw McNulty trying to steal some candy from a vending machine, and recognized the guy." Lil explains. "Unfortunately, he shot our patrol car's tires, so we had to chase him the old fashioned way, and now we can't call for back-up."

"Don't worry, we can handle this." Phil walks a step ahead, and pops his head out from the building's corner. "Okay, McNulty, this is officer Phil DeVille, and I'm giving you 3 seconds to give up! One..." A bullet hits the wall just a few inches away from Phil.

"Eh... okay, I'll give you ten seconds. One, two, three..." Phil is cut by a second bullet.

"Fine. I'll allow you to take a nap, but I want your answer after that, okay?" Phil says in a "trying to be cool" kind of way, but is cut by a bullet that gets closer than the previous. He turns to see Chuck and the girls. "I had almost convinced him..."

"That you are a fool, right? Seriously, Philip, and you still wonder why you got rejected to be a negotiator." Lil rolls her eyes, and extends her hand to Phil. "Okay, brother, just do something useful and give me more bullets. I'm out of ammo." Phil gulps, and grabs his collar.

"Well... actually, I just have a bullet left. I gave the rest of our munitions to Samantha and Nicole in exchange for their donuts..." Phil says while keeping a sheepish smile. Chuck and the girls glare at him.

"What kind of donuts, Phil? Regular, or with filling?" Lil talks in a slow and venomous voice.

"Blueberry and chocolate filling." Phil tells her with a "please don't kill me" expression.

"Oh, well. That's different." Lil smiles to him, but notices the glares from Angelica and Chuckie, and sighs. "Well, now we have a problem. It would be really risky to fight him without bullets." Angelica then remembers the box she grabbed, and offers it to Lil.

"I got this ones from McNulty. He only has the bullets left on his gun as well."

"Good movement... but sadly, we still have problems." Lil says. "These ones don't fit in our guns. Our best option is to have someone sneak from behind, and try to surprise McNulty while the rest keep him distracted."

"And who is going to do it?" Chuckie asks, and everyone look at him. He sighs. "Great. Send the guy with the colorful disguise and a yellow visible target in the middle of his chest."

"Well, Angelica can't do it, because she is the civilian here, and neither Lil or I can because, if we get shot, who is going to handcuff the bad guy?" Phil talks matter-of –factly. "Oh, and before you do it, can you give me three autographs?"

"For what? To auction them on e-Bay if he dies?" Angie snaps at Phil and gives him a furious glare. He gulps and tries to calm her down.

"Oh, no, I really want his autographs." Phil says, and Chuckie gets a flattened look. Phil continues. "I know a guy that can exchange me 3 of his for one from Vanilla Ice!"

"He takes advantage of my nobleness." Chuckie sighs, with an un-amused look.

"Come on, you are a hero, right?" Phil places his hand on Chuckie's shoulder. "What does he have to fight you? McNulty is just a brainless thug with steel muscles; a silly jerk who shots before asking; a dumb whose main intellectual activity is shooting poor guys just for the fun of it." Chuckie rises an eyebrow to Phil.

"So, in other words, I have full advantage here, right?" Chuckie replies, sarcasm evident for everyone but Phil.

"Don't worry, we'll find another way. You already helped me a lot." Angelica sighs, and gives Chuckie a sad look. Chuck then realizes that, if McNulty escapes, he might be able to come back and get revenge on the girl. After a little hesitation, he makes his choice.

"Fine. I'll do it. I got a compromise the moment I got into these tights... that, and a serious itchiness, but I have a duty to accomplish. Plus, I don't want to lose my Union's membership; we have a dance next Sunday." Chuckie says, trying to sound brave. He holds tightly his Lumper, and starts moving towards Timmy's hideout. The others look at him, worried, but admiring the guy's guts; of course, he must have a lot to be seen in public dressed that way.

Chuckie walks a couple of steps, and then returns next to his friends.

"I'm going." He tells them.

"Good luck, ColoRed." Lil says to him. Chuckie re-start his walking, but returns a second later.

"I'm already going." Chuckie says with a nervous expression.

"You can do it, dude!" Phil gives him a thumbs up. Chuckie goes back to business... and returns a third time.

"I'm on my way." Chuckie says.

"Yes, we know." Angelica says, with a little bit of annoyance on her voice. Phil and Lil already have bored looks. Chuckie moves again... and returns.

"I'm..."

"OH, PLEASE, JUST DO IT!" Phil and the girls chorus. Chuckie jumps because of surprise, and then sighs. After taking a deep breath, and accommodating his antennae, he finally walks in the open.

A shot is heard.


	5. The violence begins

THE VIOLENCE BEGINS.

Angelica and the DeVilles gasp when they hear the shot. They pop their heads from the building's corner, and see Chuckie grabbing his right shoulder, returning next to them.

"What happened?" Angelica asks, seriously scared. Chuckie look at them with a painful expression.

"Got one in my shoulder... Don't worry, I'm still going." Chuckie assures them, and starts walking again, keeping his right arm pressed against his chest, and trying to not loose his grip on the Lumper.

Another shot is heard, and the three covered guys cover their eyes. When they see again, Chuckie is walking back to them, with his left leg limping.

"The leg?" Lil asks, worried. Chuckie just nods, and starts walking again.

A third shot comes. Chuckie shakes his right hand violently, and walks back to his friends.

"Where did you got it?" Phil asks.

"My right hand... Don't worry, I'm left handed." Chuckie goes back to business, and, slowly, walks again towards the building.

Another shot comes, and Chuckie shakes his whole body, while moaning. He again walks back to his friends.

"The other hand?" Lil asks. Chuckie shakes his head.

"The other leg?" Angelica asks then, more worried than ever. Chuckie shakes again.

"The stomach?" Phil asks. Chuckie shakes a third time.

"Repeated the shoulder... I'm still going. Now is personal." Chuckie re-starts his walking.

A final shot comes, and Chuckie screams and shakes violently. He drops his mallet. Slowly, he walks back to his friends.

"Shoulder?" Lil asks. He shakes his head.

"Arm?" Angelica asks. Chuckie shakes again.

"Stomach? Steak? Liver?...Man, I'm getting hungry. OW!" Phil is cut by Lil slapping the back of his head.

"No..." Chuckie manages to say, while keeping both of his hands pressing his chest. "HEART!"

The DeVilles gulp, while Angelica gets a blank look. After a few seconds, she manages to speak.

"You... said... what I think you said?"

"Yes... don't cry for me... I already knew the risks... And Angelica, I really enjoyed meeting you... I'll remember those moments the rest of my life... or next 10 seconds, whatever happens first." Chuckie talks in a hardly audible murmur.

"You mean... you are going to die?" A single tear runs through Angie's cheek.

"Yes darling... Yes honey... Yes sweetheart..." Chuckie replies, barely heard, and then falls to the ground, right at the corner of the building, being perfectly visible for Tim, who is watching the whole scene from his hideout.

Angelica's cries are heard ten blocks away.


	6. Didn't count with his cleverness

DIDN'T COUNT WITH HIS CLEVERNESS.

Angelica is kneeled next to her geeky hero's motionless body, crying. Phil and Lil are behind her, without their cops' hats, and keeping their heads down.

Tim decides to walk away from the hideout, but still holding his gun. He needs to see this closely. Phil and Lil notice him, and back up since he is aiming at them. Angelica stands up, and look at him with hate on her eyes.

"MONSTER! How could you do that to such a great person!" Angie snaps at him. McNulty gulps a little because of her reaction, but recovers his cool after a moment.

"Well, killing a hero is always good for a criminal's reputation. I have to be sure of it, however." He points his gun to Angelica, forcing her to move back. He then kneels to look at his fallen prey. After a few seconds, his wicked smile disappears.

"Wait... where are the bullets' holes? He has no blood at all!" He exclaims. The other guys get a puzzled expression; they now realize that, because of their concern, they never checked for the ColoRed Chuck's injuries, and he never turned totally to see them face to face after the shots. A moment later, the supposed corpse smiles and sits.

"I have no blood because you never hit me. I was just pretending to be injured to make you use all your bullets." Chuckie talks in a proud tone. McNulty gasps, and tries to shot at him, but the red guy's plan worked, and has absolutely no left ammo.

"Hands up, McNulty!" Phil recovers from the surprise as well, and points at Timmy. He just mumbles something under his breath, and lift his hands, dropping his now empty gun.

"You are the best, ColoRed Chuck!" Lil exclaims happily, while handcuffing Tim.

"Didn't count with my cleverness!" Chuckie stands up, and adopts his heroic posture again... but is cut by Angelica, who slaps him violently.

"YOU FOOL! HAVE ANY IDEA OF HOW I FELT? THAT WAS FOR SCARING ME, IDIOT!" Angelica snaps at Chuckie. He covers his injured cheek, and gets an ashamed look. He didn't wanted to scare the girl, but needed to be convincing to take McNulty out of his hiding place. Maybe he overdid the acting, but it was also needed to impress everyone so theywouldn't takenote of the lack of bullet holes.

"I... am really sorry, Angelica... I didn't enjoyed it either... but.." He is cut again for Angelica, but this time she is hugging him, and giving a little kiss on the other cheek.

"And that was for being so brave...And this one, for being alive." She then presses her lips against his, and, after a few seconds, he kisses her back. They break the kiss after a minute or so, and stay staring on their places, still hugging. Phil and Lil make the classic "aaah" expression, while McNulty looks like he is going to throw his lunch.

"Oh, please! You have to do it now? Man, the moment I can get out of jail, I'm going to..."

"Walk to the nearest retirement home, I think." Phil interrupts McNulty. "Sorry, man, but, with all the charges against you, you'll be lucky if you get free after Elvis' next concert." McNulty glares at the smiling cop, while Lil does her best to hold her laughter.

The DeVilles place themselves one at each side of Tim, to prevent any escape. Lil talks to Angelica after allowing her to recover her breath.

"We need you to come with us to the station so you can declare, Angelica." Angie nods, and Lil turns around to look at Chuckie. "You will need to come as well, but later. Take a day or two to rest. I'll notice Lieutenant Carmichael about everything."

The cops and the prisoner start walking away. Angelica gives a last kiss to Chuckie, and follows them at a distance. When she is a couple of feet away from Chuckie, she turns around to look at him, and ask something.

"One last thing... how could you dodge all those bullets? You have super speed, or something?"

"Nope. Remember I told you about how my antennae prevent me from danger? Well, I just adjusted them to be extra-sensitive before I walked towards the hideout, so I could get alerted from danger a split second before the shot; sure, it was still dangerous, but that allowed me to guess the bullet's trajectory, and avoid it. The movements I made to pretend being injured were also to avoid the shots." Chuckie explains. Angelica looks at him extremely impressed.

"I guess that your movements really are coldly calculated."

"Yep. And is also a good thing that being afraid can increase your reflexes!" Chuckie chuckles. Angelica smiles at him. "See you later, Angie." Chuckie finishes, and waves good-bye while walking the opposite direction.

EPILOGUE.

A few hours later. Angelica walks out from the Police Station, with Lieutenant Carmichael next to her.

"That will be all for the moment, Miss Pickles. We'll call you later for more details. Just remember to stay in the city for the next 2 months. You'll need to be at the trial as well." Susie tells Angelica. She nods, and smiles to the police woman.

"Thanks, Lt. I'm going home right now." She then pauses, and looks at Susie with a slightly sad look. "By the way, do you know the ColoRed Chuck's adress, or his Union's phone number? I forgot to ask him for that before he left." Susie smiles at the blonde, and places a hand on her shoulder.

"Sorry. That's classified information, and only someone like Captain Wattanabe would have it. But I had worked along the ColoRed Chuck a couple of times, and know one thing about him; he'll always appear when you need help the most." She blinks an eye to Angie, and walks back inside the station.

Angelica ponders about what Susie just said, and gets her trademark mischievious look. She walks slowly through the block, and talks, in an obviously fake alarmed way.

"Chanfle! It's getting late, and my bus doesn't pass near here... and I don't think I'll get a taxi at this hour. I'll need to walk alone to my home... Oh, and now, who will protect me?"

Across the street, a guy with a black jacket and regular pants gets out from a flower shop; the jacket is half open, so a yellow heart's symbol is easily seen. His hood and antennae are down, covered by the back of the jacket. He quickly crosses the street, and gives Angelica a single rose.

"I." Chuckie smiles and gives Angelica a nice kiss on her cheek. She smiles back at him and smells the rose, always keeping her eyes on Chuck.

"You were expecting me to call you, right?" Angelica asks, amused.

"Suspected that from the beginning." Chuckie replies, and after chuckling a little, they walk down the street, holding hands.

As they walk, a heroic music is heard, consisting in trumpets and fiddles. Susie's voice is heard, singing.

(Susie)

Faster than a speeding tortoise.

Stronger than a mousie.

More noble than a lettuce.

A heart, his shield it is.

(Chorus)

The dark-souled crook.

And the merciless thug.

(Susie)

Didn't count with the cleverness...

Of the ColoRed Chuck!

(Chorus)

Chanfle! Chanfle!

(Chuckie's voice)

Suspected that from the beginning.

(Susie)

The pirate and the cat burglar.

Evil spy and bank robber.

He finishes every villain.

With his Skweaky Lumper.

The Tarzans and Spidermen

For him, have admiration.

The Batmen and Supermen.

Recognize his noble action.

(Chorus)

The dark-souled crook.

And the merciless thug.

(Susie/Chorus)

Didn't count with the cleverness...

Of the ColoRed Chuck!

(Chorus)

The ColoRed Chuck...

The ColoRed Chuck...

THE END.

And that's all, folks! (Use that phrase if you write Looney Tunes, okay?). Thanks for the opinion, Angelica.

I hope you had all enjoyed this little parody. The end song is, as you might imagine, the theme song of El Chapulín Colorado, but I adjusted it a little to make it sound better in English. (BTW, Chespirito wrote the song too... as well as many songs for soap-operas and a few other shows. No wonder he is the "Little Shakespeare", right?) Thanks for pointing that, Angie.

Also, remember that the other heroes I mentioned aren't mine either; most are property of Nickelodeon as well, and a few others belong to Warner Brothers, DC or Marvel Comics, and, in the case of Tarzan, copyrighted by the descendants of his creator, E.R. Burroughs.

Okay, that's it. Thanks a lot for reading this fic, and thanks again to Justin for posting my previous ones. Angelica. (Yep, thanks a lot you people. Please, review, and keep the good writing!)

Dedicated to Ramiro Acosta Guevara (1946-2005). God bless you, Dad.


End file.
